This is my first attempt at blogging, so we shall see how this goes. I am a new mom, and I love every minute of it! Recently, I started thinking about all of us moms who may have not have had a healthy upbringing. I myself was placed in Foster Care when I was 14 years old and although, for a time, that was a good place for me, it soon became clear that each mom I had was not what you would call a “traditional” mother. Growing up, I have had to deal with a lot of baggage which was weighed down upon me by the parents placed in my life. Sadly, I think this harmful kind of parenting has become the “norm”, and growing up in a household with two parents is now the unique version of life.
With that said, I thought maybe I should start blogging the issues, struggles and thoughts that come up in my own life as I do my best to be a mom when I haven’t had the best examples. I want to give a disclaimer: The things I will share are a bit crazy. What I went through with my birth mom may not show her in the best light, but I am happy to say that my mom has changed since then and is now doing an amazing job at being a mom to my wonderful little brother. I have gotten her blessing to share some of the not-so-great stuff that happened in my past which had, for the longest time, shaped my definition of motherhood.
I wanted to start this blog to talk about how I am doing and share the things I come across as I grow with my daughter and try to find out who I am as a person, as a mom, and a family unit with my husband. Who knows, this may not help anyone! This may just be a public place for me to blab on and on, like an open diary, but I thought if I am going through this stuff I am sure there are others out there that are as well, and possibly other bloggers doing the same thing.
I don’t know why, but I feel a bit nervous about starting this blog. I love social media, and post updates on my 9 month old baby constantly. I even had to get my phone fixed because I took too many photos of her! I love to go on Facebook and brag about how blessed I am to have such a wonderful little family. While all of this is true, it isn’t always perfect. There are times when issues come up, and I don’t post those things on social media. I personally feel that Facebook, Twitter, etc., is not the place to air out my heart. I only let my husband and my close friends hear about the personal things. Technically this is also social media so I guess I am changing my ways.
I am experiencing the nerves of starting a blog, and how posting about the difficult things that have happened in my life means being vulnerable to whoever may read this. I have given my testimony multiple times in churches and so on, but for some reason this feels harder then standing up in from of a group of people and sharing what I have been through. Although this is scary, I am excited to document what is going on. I hope to add some humor to things, but keep in mind that some issues may not be humorous at all.
Now that I have gone on and on, I will close. For those who know me, when I share or teach, I never know how to conclude! I actually just say “Amen” so this rambling is actually an attempt to bring this to a close.